{"id":5051,"date":"2016-02-02T15:47:11","date_gmt":"2016-02-02T20:47:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/?p=5051"},"modified":"2022-03-07T11:45:51","modified_gmt":"2022-03-07T16:45:51","slug":"how-mindful-children-react-differently-to-challenges-illustrated","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/how-mindful-children-react-differently-to-challenges-illustrated\/","title":{"rendered":"How Mindful Children React Differently to Challenges (Illustrated)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Growing up, I was a firecracker. I reacted quickly to situations and never hesitated to express my \u201cpassionate\u201d opinions. This often led to hurt feelings. I remember once, after a heated discussion with my brother, he asked my parents to put a coffee filter over my mouth to \u201ckeep the yucky stuff inside.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My dad later took me aside and said, \u201cRenee, you need to think before you speak. You\u2019re going to hurt people with that sharp tongue. This is something I really want you to work on.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Daddy,\u201d I replied. \u201cI feel things, and then I just say them. Why don\u2019t you understand? Why doesn\u2019t anyone understand?\u201d Then I yelled, \u201cI JUST CAN\u2019T HELP IT!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whoops. I did it again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My dad seemed upset, but he didn\u2019t speak. It was so quiet that I could hear him breathing. Finally, he said, \u201cDid you see what I just did? I was breathing. Next time you\u2019re upset, take a minute to just breathe. Just breathe in and out. Then speak.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What my dad suggested is a form of mindfulness, a particular way of paying attention to a present experience\u2014in this case, a sensory experience. In many situations since, this mindful minute has helped me filter my reactions to others. It has helped me cultivate better relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What took me much longer to learn was that the relationship I really needed to nurture was one with myself. My harshest reactions were those provoked by my inner monologue. Little molehills (e.g., an upcoming test, a worried thought) blew up into mountains of anxiety. Had I honed the ability to turn to the tool of mindfulness earlier, I\u2019m confident that I could have prevented many downward spirals of negativity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While I can\u2019t go back in time to give\u00a0little Renee these tools, I now have the privilege of working with\u00a0amazing children and teaching them skills of resilience<\/a> and mindfulness. One thing I know from my work is that mindful children react differently to challenges. To show you exactly what I mean, I\u2019ve created a few illustrations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

First, what is mindfulness?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

What does a mindful minute look like?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Before mindfulness training, challenging events can provoke quick reactions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

After mindfulness training, you can pause and create space between an event and your reaction. This transforms knee-jerk reactions into thoughtful responses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Before mindfulness training, a thought may provoke anxious feelings and behaviors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

After mindfulness training, you are skilled at halting an anxious response in its tracks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

You’ll notice that throughout this article I’ve used the words mindfulness “training”. This is because mindfulness is a skill which any child or adult can sharpen with practice. It’s a skill which the research shows can improve impulse control, calmness, kindness, patience, compassion, empathy, executive function, and attention spans in children. It’s a skill we can give the next generation of kids to not only connect more deeply with others around them, but to really nurture a sense of self-respect and self-compassion.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Growing up, I was a firecracker. I reacted quickly to situations and never hesitated to express my \u201cpassionate\u201d opinions. This often led to hurt feelings. I remember once, after a heated discussion with my brother, he asked my parents to put a coffee filter over my mouth to \u201ckeep the yucky stuff inside.\u201d My dad later took … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5049,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[531,141],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5051","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-parents","category-mindfulness-meditation","no-featured-image-padding"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5051","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5051"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5051\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5049"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5051"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5051"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gozen.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5051"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}