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Question for you to ask your kids: Why do dogs bark at mailmen?
No, it’s not a riddle. Serious question! Give up? They’re just trying to protect their owners. If you have a dog, or even if you have a neighbor with a dog, you know they’re loyal, excitable, and very, very protective (even the small, yippy ones).
Do you know what else matches that description? Anxiety. Yes, believe it or not, your anxiety is loyal to you and wants to protect you, and if you’re like me, you know it can be a little excitable.
Yes, just like a dog, anxiety can get a little confused about what’s really dangerous. The good news is that just like man’s best friend, anxiety can be tamed.
Thinking about anxiety like an overprotective pet is really helpful, especially for kids and teens. Better yet, think about it as a pet monster that is unique to you.
Project time!
- Meet Your Anxiety Monster
Have your kids grab some paper and a pen, then draw their anxiety monster. Actually, parents should be doing this too. 😉 Make it as cute or weird as you want—this is your monster, after all. Maybe it’s furry or has wings or horns. Maybe it’s spiky, like mine.
- Visualize Your Monster Protecting You
Picture this: your anxiety monster is sitting on your shoulder. It’s not huge or terrifying, just small and kinda cute. Everyone’s anxiety monster looks different. Go ahead, imagine yours. Cut out your drawing and use that if you’d like.
This little guy is super committed to keeping you safe, and he’s always whispering in your ear, telling you to watch out. The problem? It can’t always tell the difference between real threats and, well, the mailman.
- Don’t Fight the Monster—Comfort It
When your anxiety monster freaks out over something minor, your first instinct might be to yell at it or try to push it away but think of it like a scared pet. Tell your kids that instead of yelling at it, try to comfort it. When your anxiety flares up, tell your monster, “Thanks for looking out for me, but we’re safe. There’s no danger here.” Maybe even give it a little hug or a pet (if it’s not too spiky).
Visualization Works
Sure, the idea of a tiny anxiety monster on your shoulder might seem a little silly to kids, especially older ones, but visualization is actually a powerful tool. By picturing yourself calming your anxiety monster, you’re taking control of your emotions rather than letting them control you. By personifying abstract feelings of anxiety, you can begin a dialogue with your feelings. It’s like telling your brain, “Hey, I got this. We’re in charge here.”
Here’s the best part: we all have the power to train and tame our anxiety. It doesn’t have to rule your life. Next time you feel your anxiety monster getting riled up, remember that you’re the boss. You can calm it down, reassure it, and keep it from blowing things out of proportion. If it doesn’t listen at first, don’t worry. Don’t give up on training it!
Thanks this helped a lot
This is the same method used for those with OCD. They give the “OCD Monster” a name and then tell it to be quiet and leave them alone. No need to check something over and over and no reason to heed the voice that foretells doom.
Thank you for this!
Do you have something/visualisation technique for negative self talk or self-doubt?
Love it! I have 2 students I have shared it with already and they both left with a plan – to draw and name and talk to their “monster.” Thank you 🙂
i don’t have anzidy but doing the anzidy monster was fun but now i feel happy and portectve